Do you have to manage or lead someone who has tremendous potential but has a sense of lack in their life? Like something is innately wrong with them. This is an emotion that dictated the course of my life for probably 25 or 30 years and only within the last few have I got a handle on what it really means and how to actually handle it.
This is the very emotion that drove me into personal & professional development. To date I have spent close to $180,000 dollars and over 1500 hours trying to overcome this feeling of lack. Fortunately I learned some amazing skills along the way and in the process learned a shit-load about myself.
I no longer am “engaged” with this on-going internal struggle. I have freed myself from the illusion and I’ve learned how to manage my emotions and internal dialog quite well. This change did not come down upon me like a lightning bolt, it kind up snuck up on me, a little bit at a time, when suddenly I noticed I wasn’t beating myself up any longer and I was choosing to be happy and feel good. The change occurred when I stumbled upon the single most empowering awareness of my life…
Before one can empower the reality of being fulfilled and complete, one must first stop empowering the reality that one is not.
This was a bold realization for me because I felt deep inside of me such a talent for teaching, communicating, and researching, but I felt like a failure and broken at the same time. I now am able to draw on these challenging and painful experiences when helping others to grow and develop.
When I work with teams, I am able to instantly move each team member to higher productivity because I know how to help them manage this feeling of lack. It is part of just about every professional I meet. The level of Ego identification that top level Executives are challenged with no longer surprises me. They in turn often find themselves very grateful for the personal transformation.
As Professional Development expert, I have experienced first hand the draw of skill based solutions and have an extensive library to show for it. There was a time where I was reading 2 books a week and listening to self-improvement CDs 15 hours a week. I’ve been to most of the trainings on excellence that exist as well as worked with “gurus” and “millionaire mentors”. I now realize none of that was needed, but for me… it was a necessary part of my journey and has given me the tools and wisdom to truly impact the people who are drawn to my work.
When you watch a colleague or one of your employees in the throws of this internal conflict, simply put a hand on their shoulder and say, “Your beliefs about yourself are false… I believe in you and want to help you believe in yourself”. Giving a person permission to believe in them self is a foundational belief of All About Teamwork and is a fundamental principle to motivation and increased performance.
As a business owner you will learn that leadership has some subtle yet powerful nuances that help people become more of who they are meant to be... but that’s a blog topic for another day.
